Another Saturday Night And I Ain’t Got Nobody…

You either love it or hate it, look forward to it or dread its arrival. Not the new season of “The Bachelorette” (though I suppose some could argue that this gamut of emotions also holds true for that occurrance), but Valentine’s Day.

Very few holidays – I’d go so far as to say no OTHER holiday – comes complete with the varied spectrum of emotions as does February 14th. We don’t have people wearing black on Christmas or Easter as a way to mourn the arrival of this holiday, yet one could argue that those days are religious in nature, as opposed to Hallmark-inspired. Yet I believe its the very core of the day that wields the dichotomy of emotions, as traditionally this is a day for lovers. As such, some of us who are presently Lovah-free (as I am) find this day to be a bit melancholy. At least, I normally do.

For some reason, I look to Saturday with unusual apathy. While in years past I’ve taken one of two routes – either complete denial or complete sadness (both entailing consuming copious amounts of alcohol) – this year I’m quite unfazed by its arrival. Could I be growing up? Am I accepting that this day is like all others, just with more people being shmoopy, gushy and (admit it) more annoyingly lovey-dovey than usual? Or have I realized that Valentine’s Day should be no different whether you’re single or attached?

I’d say the latter. Though I do love to buy and send Valentines (especially the homemade variety with doilies, glitter and red markers), I don’t really expect much in return. I’ll admit that I’ve bought a little trinket for a friend or roommate or family member in the past (or present – can’t ruin any surprises, you know) yet am not stalking my mailbox for sentiments of affection in return. In fact, I believe the net total of gifts/cards/presents received in the past five years includes flowers from my Dad, flowers from my Mom (yeah yeah, I’m an only child), a drawing of flowers from a guy/quasi-ex, a mix CD from aforementioned guy/quasi-ex, funny cards from friends, but no 1) romantic flowers 2) sappy love letters (which, actually, I don’t think I’ve ever received said sappy love letter. Ever. That’s pretty sad, come to think of it. But I digress…) or 3) lingerie. (Though am happy to provide suggestions…) Still, with the exception of sappy love letters (c’mon, every girl wants at least ONE in her lifetime), I don’t feel like I’m missing out on too much. After all, Valentine’s Day isn’t just a day for lovers, it’s a day to recognize people that you love, friends & family included.

Valentine’s Day speaks to commitment, a commitment that I’m surprised I’m not yet ready to make. There’s something to be said for long-term relationships, but there’s something to be said for harmless flirtation, be it with a neighbor, a new crush or even a far-away friend. Flirtation is innocent as long as you keep it that way, and subtle inuendos are oft-times the impetus for a flip-flopping nervous tummy like no other. Flirtation is fun, and sometimes I’ll happily trade the lazy Sundays in bed for an email chock-full o’ sexual tension.

So as we’re infiltrated with red hearts, cupids, roses and an influx of Victoria’s Secret ads, remember that though this holiday has many interpretations on its origin, I’ll be spending it with good friends, a bottle of red and some no-stakes email banter.

That is, unless I get a better offer…

6 thoughts on “Another Saturday Night And I Ain’t Got Nobody…

  1. Ouch, that made me wince in empathy. It doesn’t seem that long ago that I was in the neighborhood of the not-too-cheery locale you appear to be visiting.
    I can only speculate, since appearances can certainly be deceiving, but judging by your photos and your writing, perhaps a lot of guys are intimidated by your combination of beauty, brains, and romanticism.
    Hopefully it won’t take you as long as it took me to find that person who makes Valentines Day superfluous (at 36 I met Lynn, we got married last May, and I’m now 39).
    You almost need the patience of Job–you must strike a balance between not settling for “good enough, I guess” and “Ah, my perfect Lancelot”. But eventually some lucky guy is going to write you that love letter (even if only metaphorically speaking).

  2. This is the first time in almost 5 years that I’ve had a boyfriend on Valentine’s day. The second time total I was datingsomeone on this controversial day. I am not a fan of Valentine’s day. Partly because of lack of male attention but mainly out of disdain for the practices of that day. You MUST buy flowers for your girl, take her out to eat, be lovey-dovey on THIS day if no other, etc. I started having Anti-Valentine day parties, held on the 13, 14, or 15 of February. It was really a chance to celebrate my love for family and friends. I would cook snack foods, find a movie that we would all like to watch, preferably one that said “NO!” to love, and just hang out. I am a romantic, but I am not a fan of Valentine’s day. This year’s Anti-V-day party was going to be great. I was goingto have it on Friday 13, maybe do a spooky, superstition theme, and play a hitchcock movie. But NOOOOO, my boyfriend wants to take me out to eat. When we started dating,I thought we had an understanding. Nothing special on V-Day. But that’s what he wants to do and really, I almost don’t mind, since he DID pick my favourite restaurant. Ah well, new found maturity in thinking about V-Day is awesome! Congratulations.

  3. I try to do something [when dating] the day before to make a point … that point being that I don’t care what damn day it is: I care.
    Not like I’m dating anyone right now.
    [The day after makes it look like you forgot … that, and it’s my mother’s birthday, and if I’m spending that day with anyone, it’ll be her. ;)]

  4. I always thought the day was overrated, even when I had a boyfriend. I am glad that it’s not bothering you too much this year.
    P.S. you look like your dad!

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