It’s that time again – the Debates are on tonight, and there’s nothing more fun than getting inebriated courtesy of our two candidates. I’ve found a few versions of these on the web, but think that the one below (created by taking the best of the ones I saw online) far surpasses the others. Thus, I present you with:
The Official Presidential Debate Drinking Game
Starring:
George W. Bush: He’s standing up in this picture
Take a sip of your drink if:
- Bush snickers inappropriately
- Bush says “terror”
- Bush talks about the coalition of the willing
- Bush’s eyebrows move as if independent of his face.
- Bush says “nuc-u-lar”
- Bush refers to a “pre 9/11 mind-set”
- Bush says “evildoer”
- Bush uses “Saddam” and “al Qaeda” in the same sentence
- Bush talks about “turning the corner”
- Bush brings up the “Global Test” that Kerry mentioned in the last debate
- Bush says “Wrong War, Wrong Time”
- Bush mentions the word “safer”
- Bush makes up a word
- Bush mentions Crawford,TX
John Kerry: Proud owner of “Sure” deodorant
Take one sip of your drink if:
- Kerry points his finger in clearly rehearsed indignation
- Kerry talks about help from our allies
- Kerry says “W stands for Wrong”
- Kerry begins a sentence with “The truth is…”
- Kerry brings up his Purple Hearts
- Kerry brings up Bush’s “Mission Accomplished” moment
- Kerry mentions Bush wants to reinstate the draft
- Kerry rolls his eyes
- Kerry refers to the UN
- You see Kerry’s face visibly sag.
Take two sips of your drink if:
- Either candidate is warned that his time is running low
- Either candidate talks past their time limit
- Either candidate says, “Jim, I’m glad you asked that question”
- Either candidate uses the term “flip flopped”
- Either candidate mentions Bush’s National Guard service
- Either candidate talks about “letting the terrorists win”
- Either candidate mentions “Axis of Evil”, “North Korea”, “Saddam Hussein”, “Freedom”, or “The American People”
- Either candidate mentions blogs or their URL
- Either candidate looks at the wrong camera
- Either candidate refers to an “ordinary American”
Finish Your Glass If:
- Anyone in the audience gets dragged out of the auditorium
- Anyone in the audience gets off an unscripted question
- Bush mispronounces any word or name
- Anyone says “Osama bin Hidin'”
- Anyone uses a sports metaphor
- Anyone attempts to speak Spanish to pander to Latinos
Do a Shot If:
- Bush mentions the deficit
- Bush accuses Kerry of being “French on terrorism”
- Kerry accuses Bush of being a pansy for avoiding Vietnam
- Bush admits he made a mistake (“miscalculation” counts)
- Ralph Nader shows up insisting on airtime
Finish the Bottle If:
- Anyone challenges anyone to a duel
- The moderator rips off his mask to reveal his true identity is Karl Rove
- Kerry sweats off his fake tan or uses the word “lock-box”
- Bush calls John Edwards “the Breck girl” or mentions “weapons of mass destruction-related program activities”
Regarding your halloween costume…How about a bag of groceries? Easily done by getting a roll of brown paper for mailing packages, and two pieces of card board, creating the bag. Draw a pig on the front with the words “Piggly Wiggly” . Use duck tape secured to the insides of bag for shoulder straps, and fasten (with staples or tape) empty food boxes from your cabinets, egg cartons, etc.
A long receipt can be used to hide the seam on the back of the costume. Dress in brown or khakis, and voila!
A few other ideas that are simple are: Smurfette, Jem, and a a BOO BEE.
Just dress as a bee with a sign that says “BOO”