Well, it’s official. I am not “too cool” for school, but in fact, too old. Yes, Aubrey might need to hang up her skates after a last spin around the rink, um, I mean, Franklin Street. Reasons why include…
…after the game, we went to La Residance, once a beautiful villa housing wedding receptions (including my friend Kelly’s), now a hip hop club. I wasn’t feeling especially hip NOR hop, but I lied and said I was writing a story for a local mag, got us in for free, paid my $3 cover, said ‘hi’ to my friends, proceeded then to say ‘bye’ to my friends, caught a cab and went home. ‘Why?’ you ask. Um, because I was tired. And my feet hurt. And I needed to take out my dentures. (Only kidding on the last one, but it’s probably next if I continue down my journey into old age.)
…we went out to Franklin Street to celebrate Halloween. Granted, this would be the first time in 6 years that I had celebrated in this manner, but seriously, how different could it be? Silly, silly Aubrey…how times have changed. The crowd was bigger, not only because some of the freshman looked like they were imbibing a bit too much on keg stands, but because apparently “Thug Life” was the theme of the evening. Now, I’m not talking about simple racial diversity; give me that any day. I’m talking more of the “I bet he’s packing” (heat, if you’re not down w/the ghetto vernacular of late) variety. At first I thought it was “free beers if you dress like Tu-pac” night, but then I realized most people weren’t even in costume. I held tight to my friend Mike’s hand, got accosted by random guys wearing only a thong (pictures will support this), walked from Spanky’s to Woody’s and back, and breathed a sigh of relief for not being stabbed/shot/beaten in the process. But oh, my costume was delightful.
…I didn’t have a hangover. I mean, binge drinking is still allowable when you’re in a college town, isn’t it? Apparently, my more ‘mature’ side stepped in as the sheer number of beers consumed (on an empty stomach on Saturday, no less) was nowhere near the “I’m wasted and I’m gonna pay for this tomorrow” category; more of the “why did I have that last beer? It’s SO past my bedtime” variety.
I mean, please. You’d think I was OLD or something…like 28.