I snapped at three people today.
I don’t know if it’s the incessent rain, the bizarre feeling of apathy mixed with discontent that has been so pervasive as of late or what the exact cause is, but for some reason I’m just not myself. I’m trying to snap out of it; really, I am! The In-&-Out Chocolate shake didn’t work (though it WAS tasty), the trip to the shoe store didn’t do it either, nor did the thought of a date later this week (and we know that should certainly snap me out of ANY funk.) No, I seem to have landed ass-first in a pile o’ grumpiness, which is apparently a tricky place to emerge from.
I’m not used to this demeanor, this whiny, bitchy gal that I’ve seem to become today. Hell, I’m a trooper – I break bones regularly and still ski down the mountain! I go to school dances with two (day-glo) casts on my arms! I trudge through the drudgery of boring work with a smile on my face (or, well, at least not a big frown.) Did you know frowning takes like a bazillion more muscles than a smile? I’m risking wrinkles for this mood I’m in! EGADS!
Good things have been happening; I’m trying to concentrate on these. Friends in town! Friends MOVING to town! Friends with PUPPIES THAT PLAY WITH LILA moving to town! Oysterfests and Street Fairs and Concerts, oh my! Coachella up on the horizon, with a wedding and the promise of a month without daily rain before. Really, these are good, good things. And yet the black cloud o’ doom has descended upon me sometime in the past few days. I’m just walking around feeling like a sack o’ ick.
My friend suggested he knew what was causing this funk; I literally punched him in the head for trying to tie it back to PMS (that, and he wouldn’t stop singing the ‘Shoe Carnival’ jingle even though I warned him he was risking a head-bashing.) I’d say I’d go home and drown my funk in a glass of (lovely, very robust, quite pricey) red wine but have watched too many after-school specials to know that this isn’t necessarily a good remedy. (Two glasses, on the other hand, may just do it.)
I don’t like this funktified state I’m in. I want excitement, I want surprises, I want some brightness on the horizon.
Hell, I just want a day without rain.