I once had a friend who posted some nasty things about me on her website. Why she was possessed to do this is beyond me – in fact, she interpreted a genuinely sincere action on my part as a way to somehow put attention back on me. When I confronted her with it (after asking everyone I knew if there was ANY way I could be over-reacting about it; the answer was a solid ‘no’), she became increasingly defensive, reminded me that not EVERYTHING she wrote was about me (because, of course, being the center of the Universe and all, I would assume otherwise) and that she had written it a long time ago and just had scheduled a future posting.
She was lying through her teeth (for too many coincidental reasons otherwise) but the concept itself wasn’t necessarily a farce; I do it myself, writing things as they happen and then posting it much later.
Yes, people, again you’re learning that you’re getting the Aubrey-approved version of myself, the me that I’m letting you see and know and assume is at least chronological. In that assumption, you’re wrong.
I know a lot of writers, I talk to a lot of them, and what I’ve gathered is that we all do this differently; some jot down notes and then bring them all to the ‘table’ when it’s their designated time to write; others, like myself, have to stop and write when the inspiration hits. It’s usually when I have a few precious, fleeting seconds to myself where I’m not over-analyzing something, commonly occurring when I’m driving to work or drying my hair or right before I fall asleep. When it’s a simple post – more of an ‘in the moment’ entry about lunch or Promsumating or something light – it usually IS chronological. Meaning, you’re getting it when I wrote it. But there are certain other things, certain topics that are still too close to my heart that I write about in the midst of the pain or confusion or contemplation but choose to schedule to post much later when I (hopefully) am at a different place and can be a little less attached to everything. It’s this latter group of posts that drive people to unnecessary assumptions.
As I’ve said many, many times before, maintaing a ‘persona’ on the internet is potentially met with complications. People think they know you from reading what you wrote; others that DO know you take what you write to heart. Those who are in my day-to-day circle (not to mention those who are kind enough to spend the day IMing me about inane topics ad nauseum) can even get confused; one day, I’m happy as can be, and the next day this long, introspective post appears. Bipolar Aubrey? No, it’s just likely I wrote it a few weeks or months back when I was in the midst of something. I don’t label these as such, but – as I’ve said about flickr and life and my posts – don’t assume.
Just remember: when you’re consuming AubreySabala.com, be sure to take it with a grain of salt.