Relationships are complicated beasts. And by 'complicated', imagine if a Chupacabra mated with a Liger who is the half-brother of a Minotaur and the cousin of a Unicorn. Only about ten times *more* complicated. For one, you're not only dealing with the issues that you bring into the relationship – and trust me, honey, you're bringin' some – but you're also dealing with the other person's. And sometimes the other person's FORMER person's (and often, former people). It's a mashup of the ghosts of relationships past, and it ain't pretty.
And yet we continue to put ourselves through this; mainly, I suppose, because we still buy into the hope that it's worth it. That the games and the drama, however strongly avoided, will one day be a distant memory, faded by time and experience and the success when "it all works out." Maybe. We hope.
Somehow we still have to maintain a sense of humor about it all; that is, when the wounds aren't fresh and nobody's repeatedly pouring epic-sized bottles of salt into them. Relationships are funny, amusing, often hilarious entities. They keep us on our toes, and in retrospect, give us writers more material by the reality of the ridiculous situations than would months of brainstorming intricate plots. The nuance is hopefully recorded – somewhere, anywhere – and written about when some time has passed and the anger has finally started to abate. When the hurt just doesn't seem so important anymore. When we remember that each relationship we enter into is there to teach us something that we'll take into the next.
Such as: listening to yourself, and your concerns, and not letting your friends talk you into a relationship.
Such as: trusting your intuition.
Such as: realizing that if you're choose to watch Gossip Girl over making out with your new beau, you've got a much bigger problem than trying to decide who's hotter: Chuck Bass or Nate Archibold.
Because really, we all know it's Nate, hands down.
My vote is for Chuck Bass…. Nate is hot.. but Chuck.. he’s just on another level.
i love this post. and it also reminds me of all the many reasons we are friends. and i value you (give thanks for 😉 you as a friend. it made me think of something i wrote a while ago, and it inspired me to reflect on where i have come in the last few years. http://stephdub.com/2008/11/26/the-balance-between-starting-fresh-and-remembering-where-we-came-from/
❤
s
I found you on twitter.. just wanted to say hello. I was wondering the name of the font used for your graphic above?
I tend to make the same mistake over and over and date girls that I don’t even like. It’s a mix between not wanting to be alone and just plain settling for who is in your life at the moment. It’s not fair for the relationship and the other person but I for one need to learn to say no.
I’m dating this girl at the moment but it’s nothing serious. Well, now over the Thanksgiving weekend a girl from the past has entered my life and is now single. This wouldn’t matter but she is only the most intelligent, beautiful, wonderful, 1st grade teacher, can cook, did I saw beautiful, woman I have ever meet. We meet at the gym months ago until she disappeared to accept a teaching job and now she shows interest because of the newly single status.
Oh fucking geez I’m talking away like I’m on my blog or something.
Relationships are serious but I’m going to treat them and life as best I can…..just rock it and have a good time. The words of Dave Matthews said it best: “There are bad times, but that’s okay, just look for the love in it, don’t burn the day away.”
Sure, Nate’s all “boy next door, Abercrombie and Fitch hot” but Chuck? I’d let Chuck ravish me and leave me for dead.
When it comes to relationships I steal a phrase my brothers use to describe the difficulties and how we handle them….
“That girl doesn’t have issues. She has a subscription…..”
Life and relationships are like travel, never take on more baggage than you can carry yourself.