We interrupt your previously scheduled broadcast to bring you these important messages:

• I don’t feel like doing work today.
• I really don’t like Fruit Loops.
• For some reason, every song that I have saved on my computer is of the dirge-like morose-inspiring theme. This, coupled with the omnipresent gray skies, are sending me into Seasonal Affective Disorder-esque moods.
• On weekdays, I wake up at 7:45 or 8. If you call earlier than that (say, 6am?) I will be an unhappy Aubrey, a mood you should remember and fear from days gone by.
• We get to order in free lunch today. Bestill my Roly-Poly-loving heart.
• It’s supposed to rain at the beach all weekend. I need EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU in Internet-land to pray for sunny skies over Wrightsville Beach.
• There is a vitamin called “horny goat weed.” I’m scared of this.
• Finding out percentages of x should NOT be part of my job requirement. It makes me want to return to the days of college where I drank Amaretto Sours prior to every math class.
• “Jericho” by Weekend Players is one of the sexiest songs ever made.
• I’ve been trying to put together my birthday list, being that the big day is just around the corner and offering you all tangible suggestions is just in my kind & giving nature, but I really have NO idea what I want. (That is, what I want that is actually a legitimate & legal request.)
• Of the 30 of you who filled out my “What Should I do With My Website” survey, approximately 20.6% of you wished I would take off my shirt.
• I still want to go to Vegas.
• I love my car even though I’ve eaten approximately 800% calories less since I have purchased it, a result of my pauper-dom.
• Finding the percentage of x was NOT used to find the roughly estimated figure above.
• Will the sun ever shine again?
• Gap Body is one of the best stores ever created.
• It is so cold in this room that I’m THIS close to hibernating and growing fur.
• I also need EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU in Internet Land to streamline your energy on making the out-of-nowhere, pre-beach potentially insanely gigantic zit, conveniently popping up between my un-professionally tweezed eyebrows, disintegrate. You’ve got 24 hours.
• I need to remember to make a mix CD tonite – suggestions accepted below in Comments.

  That’s all. We will now return you to your regularly scheduled broadcast, already in progress.

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