Changes

Do you ever look at your life, evaluating what you have, what you don’t, and what you wish you could change?

Sure, we all have our imperfections that we tend to concentrate (fixate!) on…from those 5 pounds we’ve been trying to lose for 5 years to the way our second toe is longer than our first (legend has it that means we’re royalty!), we put a lot of emphasis on our shortcomings.

We make New Years Resolutions, give not only food, but habits, up for Lent…any chance where we can to try and reform ourselves we at least try to take.

Yet the question remains…what would happen if we DID lose those pounds, WERE more patient, or really DID give up caffeine? If we were the person that we wished to be, would we still be “us”‘?

I’ve got mixed thoughts on this one…a few of my “wanna-be’s” are small things…making my bed every day, watching less tv, reading more books. All relatively do-able, and all (so far!) are going pretty well. But the larger desires…being in a Hollywood movie, having a better singing voice, finding true enjoyment in running (instead of the temporary endorphine high), well, those are somewhat significant.

Looking back, I learned as much from my mistakes, my failures, my losses than I have from my successes. Though at the time the small letdowns seemed extremely important, I learned to heed my parents’ advice and imagine if they would be important to me 6 months or a year out. (Yes, I remember thinking that not making the All-Star softball team in 4th grade was a life-changing event, but, shockingly enough, I seem to be doing ok…) Hindsight is 20:20…

As we continue to grow and add to the cacophony of experiences that collectively represent our lives, we need to find a good balance of acceptance and self-evaluation. Change is inevitable…friends get engaged and married, we leave one job to start another, we move across town or even across the country. Figuring out what is important and what is secondary allows us to prioritize our needs, wants, and helps us make attainable goals for us to reach. In the end, saves a lot of stress and self-doubt.

So, until you see me in a big-screen flick or hear me as Tina Turner’s backup singer, I remain, simply,

-aubs

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