This was the cause of my (not-so-subtly-hidden) gigglefest at the office today. FACE LIKE A SHITFLAP!
Author Archives: aubs
I love this for approximately 984 reasons, not the least being that Noah Kalina is a genius. And does look dashing in his Warby Parkers!
When my photographer pal Noah Kalina was in LA for our Everyday video shoot, I mentioned to him that I’d been contacted by the eyeglasses retailer Warby Parker, who happened to be one of my favorite companies. Noah goes, he goes, “I want to be in it.” And the idea came instantly, right there in front of Umami Burger. The good people at Warby Parker signed off on it, and out we went to Brooklyn to shoot the thing.
Honestly, it’s one of the most gratifyingly silliest ideas I’ve gotten to make, and in service of a product far more stylish and cool than I have any right to be a part of. They’re really good glasses. I wear three pairs interchangeably, including these from the new sunglasses line.
And I almost forgot to mention. REGGIE FUCKING WATTS. The narrator is Reggie Watts. I don’t know how it happened either. It just is, so let’s just go with it.
The UPS guy is the inimitably charming, Put This On’s own auteur-in-residence Benjamin Ahr Harrison.
Many excruciatingly talented people helped make this. Here they are:
- DP: Benji Bakshi
- Producer: Preston Clay Reed
- Production designer: Dara Wishingrad
- Music: Junk Culture (Deepak Mantena)
- Sound designer: Emily Ridgway
- UPM: Kids With Candy
- 1st AD: Schuyler Weiss
- H/MU: Annamarie Tendler
- Phony website: Brian Fernandes
- Casting: Roxana Altamirano
(Source: https://www.youtube.com/)
This put me in such a good mood, I even wrote a kind note to the dumbass real estate broker. The magical power of adorableness!
Morning Fluff: Paging Henry Mancini: Baby elephant trying to figure out this whole “trunk” business while taking its first steps.
[sayomg.]
Sarah brown, you are going to lose your shit.
1. AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH
2. GPOY
(Source: https://www.youtube.com/)
Generation X is sick of your bullshit
(Linked above, but since I love this so much, I’ve republished the full article below from Mat Honan’s Tumblr. Bravo, Mat, even though I don’t know you, I kind of want to kiss you right now. WITH TONGUE.)
Generation X Doesn’t Want to Hear It
Earlier generations have weathered recessions, of course; this stall we’re in has the look of something nastier. Social Security and Medicare are going to be diminished, at best. Hours worked are up even as hiring staggers along: Blood from a stone looks to be the normal order of things “going forward,” to borrow the business-speak. Economists are warning that even when the economy recuperates, full employment will be lower and growth will be slower—a sad little rhyme that adds up to something decidedly unpoetic. A majority of Americans say, for the first time ever, that this generation will not be better off than its parents.
Generation X is sick of your bullshit.
The first generation to do worse than its parents? Please. Been there. Generation X was told that so many times that it can’t even read those words without hearing Winona Ryder’s voice in its heads. Or maybe it’s Ethan Hawke’s. Possibly Bridget Fonda’s. Generation X is getting older, and can’t remember those movies so well anymore. In retrospect, maybe they weren’t very good to begin with.
But Generation X is tired of your sense of entitlement. Generation X also graduated during a recession. It had even shittier jobs, and actually had to pay for its own music. (At least, when music mattered most to it.) Generation X is used to being fucked over. It lost its meager savings in the dot-com bust. Then came George Bush, and 9/11, and the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. Generation X bore the brunt of all that. And then came the housing crisis.
Generation X wasn’t surprised. Generation X kind of expected it.
Generation X is a journeyman. It didn’t invent hip hop, or punk rock, or even electronica (it’s pretty sure those dudes in Kraftwerk are boomers) but it perfected all of them, and made them its own. It didn’t invent the Web, but it largely built the damn thing. Generation X gave you Google and Twitter and blogging; Run DMC and Radiohead and Nirvana and Notorious B.I.G. Not that it gets any credit.
But that’s okay. Generation X is used to being ignored, stuffed between two much larger, much more vocal, demographics. But whatever! Generation X is self-sufficient. It was a latchkey child. Its parents were too busy fulfilling their own personal ambitions to notice any of its trophies—which were admittedly few and far between because they were only awarded for victories, not participation.
In fairness, Generation X could use a better spokesperson. Barack Obama is just a little too senior to count among its own, and it has debts older than Mark Zuckerberg. Generation X hasn’t had a real voice since Kurt Cobain blew his brains out,Tupac was murdered, Jeff Mangum went crazy, David Foster Wallace hung himself,Jeff Buckley drowned, River Phoenix overdosed, Elliott Smith stabbed himself (twice) in the heart, Axl got fat.
Generation X is beyond all that bullshit now. It quit smoking and doing coke a long time ago. It has blood pressure issues and is heavier than it would like to be. It might still take some ecstasy, if it knew where to get some. But probably not. Generation X has to be up really early tomorrow morning.
Generation X is tired.
It’s a parent now, and there’s always so damn much to do. Generation X wishes it had better health insurance and a deeper savings account. It wonders where its 30s went. It wonders if it still has time to catch up.
Right now, Generation X just wants a beer and to be left alone. It just wants to sit here quietly and think for a minute. Can you just do that, okay? It knows that you are so very special and so very numerous, but can you just leave it alone? Just for a little bit? Just long enough to sneak one last fucking cigarette? No?
Whatever. It’s cool.
Generation X is used to disappointments. Generation X knows you didn’t even read the whole thing. It doesn’t want or expect your reblogs; it picked the wrong platform.
Generation X should have posted this to LiveJournal.
New York Newbie
So I’ve officially been an NYC resident for nineteen days. And most of them have been glorious; I truly picked the best time of the year to come here, especially to fill the seasonless gap that was six years in San Francisco. New York has an autumn, people, and no, I’m not talking about that four-day stretch of Indian Summer that San Francisco receives in late-September or early-October that puts everyone in a good mood except when they feel obligated to complain about the evenings being too hot to sleep. Look at that…just three weeks out of the city and already I’m bitching about my former habits. But anyway, back to East Coast, seasonal Autumn.
There are leaves on the trees! That turn COLORS! And fall breezes…hearty ones, at that. Yes, there have been the occasional rainstorm (how ever do you New York ladies retain cute hair and look darling on dates when walking in windy, rainy weather?) but hey, Lauren Conrad created the braid trend for a reason, and that reason is most surely salvaging my hotness in inclement weather. (God Bless You, LC.)
That’s not to say that the move has gone flawlessly, though – knock on wood – I’m pleased that a lot of the possible snafus have largely remained hypothetical: Lila Belle (all 34 lbs. of her) was an angel on the flight here, TSA officers didn’t notice that she was 20 lbs. more than the maximum size of an in-cabin animal, my luggage arrived relatively unscathed (minus a broken $30 suitcase that I had forced my ex to buy the day before the move to transport a huge bag of shoes I had forgotten I owned), we’ve settled into a lovely sublet and are preparing for a move to a permanent (HUGE! GIGANTIC! UNHEARD OF!) apartment at the beginning of next month, and save for a night full o’ Margaritas (I’m looking at you, BC) I’ve remained relatively tame here in the city that doesn’t sleep.
But there’s some things I hadn’t anticipated about the city, even after practically living here for the better part of 18 months. Those things that you only realize once you’re truly a resident, not a ‘mooching off a boyfriend so you have a place to leave your running shoes and extra coat’ quasi-denizen. These are the things that once you get settled in, you forget that you were cursing every single locksmith in the city. Your hatred towards the taxi drivers that refuse to take you to Brooklyn (even though that’s illegal?) It wanes. You get used to it. Your frustration with tourists in Times Square? No, that remains. SERIOUSLY, PEOPLE. DO NOT STOP WALKING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SIDEWALK TO TAKE A PICTURE OF A BILLBOARD. (Phew. Ok. I feel better.) But yes, there’s some things I wished I had known, some large, some small, before I moved here, not because it would have changed my mind (nothing would have), but instead because I feel I would be less frustrated had I just known about these idosyncracies. And so I present:
The New York Newbie’s Guide to the Big Apple: An Incomplete List of Random Shit I Learn on a Daily Basis (presented in no particular order)
1. Getting a dog walker is harder than you expected. Not because they don’t have them in NYC (there are plenty), but because most of the buildings have front door locks that come with fancy “Do Not Duplicate” keys. And most landlords/building maintenance companies issue approximately two. Which doesn’t work well if: You live with someone AND You need a spare set for guests. You have a dogwalker. [Insert sundry need for an additional key here.] And locksmiths, don’t get me started. While some are pleasant, simply telling you they aren’t allowed to duplicate these keys, others look at you like you’re a creature from another planet when you ask how to get another key if they won’t do it. There’s notes on Yelp and other sites that list companies that illegally copy these keys, and there are underground rumblings amongst friends on who does it, but the long and the short of it is: Do not expect to get a key duplicated easily. (But if you slip me $5, I’ll tell you who did mine.)
2. Speaking of dogs, even girl dogs lift their legs here. It’s because other dogs (looking at you, male pups) pee on the sides of buildings. And trees. And fire hydrants. At brunch on Saturday, I saw a dog aim & pee on his owner’s leg the other morning: hand to God. And so girl dogs (well, at least MY girl dog) has decided SHE needs to follow suit. WEIRD. So I now have a girl dog that not just looks, but also acts, like a boy dog. Awesome.
3. People brunch LATE. Like, 2pm late. I know I’m an early riser and all, but I’m used to rockin’ 11:30 or even noon brunches. 2pm? Y’all, I should be three mimosas in and contemplating karaoke at that point.
4. People stay out LATE. 4am. On a weeknight. And while we’re on that point, weekends are relatively tame. But Monday-Thursday? My friends are out nearly every night, boozin’ it up, and still somehow making it to work on time. Of anything, this has been my hardest adjustment, since 10pm traditionally serves as my bedtime, not my dinner reservation.
5. People ARE late. Perpetually. And I think it’s contagious. I mean, I’m one of those people who is ON TIME. Painfully. And my pet peeve is people being late, assuming that if they text me that they’re running late, it absolves them of their crime of tardiness. And yet, there must be something in this widely-touted-as-tasty-though-I-don’t-get-it tapwater that screws with my Type-A, timely self. Because save for one minor, magical occasion, I’ve been 5-10 (ok, Will, 20) minutes late to every. single. meeting. Brunch, dinner, lunch, etc. I blame it on miscalculating public transportation, or that for a while I was assuming that blocks and avenues contain the same distance in between (false: apparently an avenue spans approx. 4 street blocks!) but that doesn’t make up for the fact that I AM ALWAYS LATE. (But, then again, so are they.) SEE? The excuses have begun already!
And yet I love it. I really do. I’m getting settled into a new schedule, having to actually walk my dog in the mornings & evenings vs. just opening the door and having her go in the back yard. But I like it; I get to spend a lot more time with her, and I do like having habits. (My newfound morning walk to the coffee truck, however, is still under fiscal responsibility and health review.) I am still meeting people, but have enjoyed seeing my friends here and walking home – to my house! – vs. cabbing it to a hotel. I’m still awaiting my beloved Tempurpedic to arrive, but furnishing a new apartment is fun…I’m building out a closet today! And I get to buy a new couch! Who cares if I’m broke: I’m buying a new COUCH! I’m trying to remember if I felt this way when I had just moved to SF (I’m sure I could re-read my website to find out, since I actually posted on it back then) but I’m enjoying the little things. Except for the annoying people in Times Square. LEARN HOW TO WALK!
Spiralling: Aubs Sept. 2011 Mix
On my last day in SF, I made sure to do something extremely important: Upload this mix to my server. Because, you see, I realized I wouldn’t have a computer for a few weeks and seriously wanted to get ahead of my game. FOR ONCE. Alas, here we are, approaching mid-October, and you know what they say about best-laid plans. (They say I should stop making them.)
Regardless, this mix was thrown together a bit more quickly than ones in the past, and I don’t even have one song queued up on the October mix. (UPDATE: Since I started this draft yesterday, I know have two. That’s progress, friends.) September, as it often is, was a whirlwind. Leaving my job. Traveling. Packing. Reconnecting with people. Moving 3000 miles away. You know, your typical month. And yet there’s some of my favorite songs on this mix. It’s a good mix of new releases and older classics…Elliott Smith’s Waltz #2 still pervades my soul, so I included a live version of it. Atlas Genius’ single, “Trojans”, is being widely touted as a new hit from this Australian band (and you know how I feel about Australians. In case you don’t, the word “addicted” comes to mind.) Death Cab for Cutie ended their show at the Hollywood Bowl with Transatlanticism, and I’ve yet to stop thinking about it. As for Fade Into You, well, it’s always given me goosebumps too.
I’ve recently realized how much I’ve been introduced to new music through the amazing DJs onSirius XMU, especially Jake Fogelnest and Josiah. Without a car these days, I’m going to need to be more active in music discovery, so if you all have suggestions on what you’re digging lately, leave ‘em in the comments, Tweet me at @aubs or email ‘em to me.
In the meantime, enjoy my (belated as usual) monthly mix for September: Spiralling.
1. This is Why We Fight: The Decemberists
2. Spiralling: Keane
3. All I Ever Wanted: The Airborne Toxic Event
4. Balance: Future Islands
5. Boys Around Here: Fences
6. You Said: The Horrors
7. Still New: Smith Westerns
8. Morning Thought: Dale Earnhardt Jr. Jr.
9. My Mistakes: Eleanor Friedberger
10. The Look: Metronomy
11. Midnight City: M83
12. Time Won’t Let Me Go: The Bravery
13. Trojans: Atlas Genius
14. Video Games: Lana Del Ray
15. Transatlanticism: Death Cab for Cutie
16. Waltz #2 (live): Elliott Smith
17. Fade Into You: Mazzy Star
(In case you missed it, I posted all of my monthly mixes in one spot HERE.)
Spiralling: Aubs’ September 2011 Mix
On my last day in SF, I made sure to do something extremely important: Upload this mix to my server. Because, you see, I realized I wouldn't have a computer for a few weeks and seriously wanted to get ahead of my game. FOR ONCE. Alas, here we are, approaching mid-October, and you know what they say about best-laid plans. (They say I should stop making them.)
Regardless, this mix was thrown together a bit more quickly than ones in the past, and I don't even have one song queued up on the October mix. (UPDATE: Since I started this draft yesterday, I know have two. That's progress, friends.) September, as it often is, was a whirlwind. Leaving my job. Traveling. Packing. Reconnecting with people. Moving 3000 miles away. You know, your typical month. And yet there's some of my favorite songs on this mix. It's a good mix of new releases and older classics…Elliott Smith's Waltz #2 still pervades my soul, so I included a live version of it. Atlas Genius' single, "Trojans", is being widely touted as a new hit from this Australian band (and you know how I feel about Australians. In case you don't, the word "addicted" comes to mind.) Death Cab for Cutie ended their show at the Hollywood Bowl with Transatlanticism, and I've yet to stop thinking about it. As for Fade Into You, well, it's always given me goosebumps too.
I've recently realized how much I've been introduced to new music through the amazing DJs on Sirius XMU, especially Jake Fogelnest and Josiah. Without a car these days, I'm going to need to be more active in music discovery, so if you all have suggestions on what you're digging lately, leave 'em in the comments, Tweet me at @aubs or email 'em to me.
In the meantime, enjoy my (belated as usual) monthly mix for September: Spiralling.
1. This is Why We Fight: The Decemberists
2. Spiralling: Keane
3. All I Ever Wanted: The Airborne Toxic Event
4. Balance: Future Islands
5. Boys Around Here: Fences
6. You Said: The Horrors
7. Still New: Smith Westerns
8. Morning Thought: Dale Earnhardt Jr. Jr.
9. My Mistakes: Eleanor Friedberger
10. The Look: Metronomy
11. Midnight City: M83
12. Time Won't Let Me Go: The Bravery
13. Trojans: Atlas Genius
14. Video Games: Lana Del Ray
15. Transatlanticism: Death Cab for Cutie
16. Waltz #2 (live): Elliott Smith
17. Fade Into You: Mazzy Star
You were what I wanted
I gave what I gave
I’m not sorry I met you
I’m not sorry it’s over
I’m not sorry there’s nothing to save…
I’m not sorry there’s nothing to save.
And this is why Michael and I get along well. WANT.
The key element to a dream kitchen…
Two weeks ago I got a call from my doctor, who I’d gone to see the day before because I’d been feeling worn out and was losing weight, and wasn’t sure why.
He was brief: “Amit, you’ve got Acute Leukemia. You need to enter treatment right away.”
I was terrified. I packed a backpack full of clothes, went to the hospital as he’d instructed, and had transfusions through the night to allow me to take a flight home at 7am the next day. I Googled acute leukemia as I lay in my hospital bed, learning that if it hadn’t been caught, I’d have died within weeks.
—
I have a couple more months of chemo to go, then the next step is a bone marrow transplant. As Jay and Tony describe below, minorities are severely underrepresented in the bone marrow pool, and I need help.
A few ways to help:
- If you’re South Asian, get a free test by mail. You rub your cheeks with a cotton swab and mail it back. It’s easy.
- If you’re in NYC, you can go to this event my friends are putting on.
- If you know any South Asians (India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Nepal, Bhutan, Maldives, or Sri Lanka), please point ‘em to the links above. Thank you.
My friend Amit Gupta founded my favorite photography site Photojojo. A few weeks ago, he was diagnosed with leukemia. Amit is one of the nicest, most genuine, most creative people you could ever meet. Prior to founding the awesome Photojojo, he also co-founded Jelly in 2006 in NYC, a coworking community, that’s now spread to 60 cities across the world and helped spark the coworking revolution. It looks like Amit will need a bone marrow transplant quite soon. We can help him with that.
Unlike blood transfusions, finding a genetic match for bone marrow that his body will accept is no easy task. The national bone marrow registry has 9.5 million records on file, yet the chances of someone from South Asian descent of finding a match are only 1 in 20,000.
This is where we come in. We’re going to destroy those odds.
How? By finding and registering as many people of South Asian descent as we possibly can.
Tests are easy– a simple swab of the cheek. If you’re a match, the donation involves an outpatient procedure. It’s not fun, but it’s not dangerous either. And doing it could save a life.
We are encouraging anyone of South Asian descent to take a test to see if you’re a match.
You can get a free test by mail, or, if you’re in New York, you can join us Friday, October 14th for a special party to rally support.
We’ll have test kits on hand at the party, as well as music, booze, and maybe even a photo booth. It will, for the first time, combine a House 2.0-style party with a New Work City-style party, and if you’ve ever been to either, you know they are always something special.
Please spread the word and please do everything you can to help Amit beat leukemia. He’s a superstar.
Much thanks to Tony and pals for organizing this event, and EVERYONE who’s been tweeting and reblogging.
Please help get the word out any way you can. My life quite literally depends on it.
AubreySabala.com 